Three Finger Cove – Robert
Copyright © 2012 - 2015
All rights reserved
All rights reserved
Monday morning at school happened exactly as Harry Fletcher, Trevor's dad, said it would. The girls were totally miffed at not being invited to, at least, swim at the Cove and, in so many words, let the boys know it. The boy's, for their part, chose to ignore the pesky girls but Trevor didn't appreciate that this one girl started all the fuss, and said so.
"Emily … it had to be you who started all this … the girls being mad at us boys. Yes, you weren't invited! Robert's had the guys over to skateboard lots of times and you, all of you, never once made any comment about that. But, Emily, ever since I found out you wanted me to be 'your' boyfriend, I've purposefully been avoiding you. I will NOT have ANY girl choose who I will like and or date, period!
"So, when you found out I happened to be at The Cove, and would swim and have a sleepover, YOU … you decided to call up all your like-minded girlfriends to get them all up in arms against us boys. Tough! Deal with it! And STOP calling my house, Emily! The more you call the more hell will freeze over before I answer your phone call, or ever want you to be my girlfriend!" Trevor loudly chastised Emily.
Trevor didn't care if the other girls got offended, or not, at what he said. He knew he directed his answer at Emily but hoped the other girls would take the hint. He hated the way all the girls treated him, and his friends, and how they are always bugging them to 'like' someone, or call them, etc.
Emily just stood there, mouth open, not believing anyone, especially a boy, would ever think to talk to her like that. On cue, the tears began to flow. Immediately, her girl friends gathered around her and then looked over their shoulders to give 'death' stares at Trevor.
Unbeknownst to all those present, Mr. Chassen, one of the few male teachers, saw and heard everything that transpired and became impressed at how the 7th grade boy took on the 7th grade girl clique. He thought to himself, "I'll wait and watch to see what, if anything, the girls say or do to cause problems for Trevor. If they do, I'll support the lad knowing the majority of the female teachers would probably side with the girls."
The girls continued to not only ignore Trevor, during morning classes, but they also focused their ire at the other five boys, but Robert in particular. They all supported Emily no matter that everything Trevor said was true. They made it appear they all were offended and the boys would regret what happened that morning.
It happened during Lunch Period. One of the female teachers heard the girls talking, about what happened before classes began, and seeing Emily wiping her eyes, from what looked like tears, got curious. The 'concerned' female teacher went over to the girls to see what she could find out.
Hearing that a boy, namely Trevor Fletcher, not only belittled Emily and attacked her, in front of all her friends, but also in front of a number of boy's. Hearing all that, the female teacher was livid. She knew she had to do something about it, so she left in a hurry to talk to the Principal.
Daniel Chassen observed what happened and, even though he didn't hear what transpired between the girls and Ms. Merriweather, knew the Principal would soon be involved. He knew the boys needed someone on their side, so he began walking towards the Principal's office.
Dan Chassen arrived just in time to overhear Mary Merriweather take what happened between Trevor and Emily totally out of context. She made it seem that ALL the boys involved ganged up on Emily and they kept saying horrible things to her. He listened, a bit longer, before stepping inside the outer office, where the two were talking.
"What's the meaning of listening in to our private conversation, Daniel Chassen?" loudly objected Mary Merriweather.
"Well … I'd say that a private conversation usually happens in 'Private' and NOT in the outer office where anyone could hear. I noticed you allowed Ms. Andrews, the secretary, to listen into YOU'RE so called 'Private' conversation!" Daniel Chassen fired back.
"Well, I never!" harrumphed Mary Merriweather.
"You know, Mary, it's about time, don't you think?" said a smiling Mr. Chassen.
"What can I do for you, Mr. Chassen," asked the Principal, Abigail Chadwick.
"It's what I can do for you, Ms. Chadwick," announced Dan Chassen. "I did, by the way, overhear what Ms. Merriweather conveniently misconstrued to you about what actually happened during the discussion Trevor had with Emily, this morning, before classes began. You see … I watched it, as it happened!"
"You did no such thing, Daniel!" argued Mary Merriweather.
"Oh, on the contrary, Mary, I most certainly did. And, I do believe this discussion should be held behind closed doors, don't you Ms. Chadwick?" came back Daniel Chassen.
The three educators entered the Principal's office and closed the door thus keeping Ms. Andrews from hearing the truth. Even with knowing another side, to what Ms. Merriweather revealed, would be discussed, that didn't keep Jane Andrews from calling her fellow gossipers and spread a rumor. She told her best friend that six, or more, boys would be expelled because of their attacking a female student. It didn't take long for the rumor to spread like wildfire.
Inside the Principal's office, Mr. Chassen told Abigail Chadwick what actually happened outside the schoolhouse doors, early that morning. The entire time he talked, Mary Merriweather kept interrupting not allowing the man to complete an entire sentence. Finally, Mr. Dan, as the kids called him, had enough and asked the Principal if he could talk to her in private seeing the 'other' person in the room would not allow him to speak.
Mary Merriweather exited the office in a huff. She further fanned the rumor mill by asserting that Mr. Chassen actually saw the altercation happen and encouraged the attack by the boys. She knew that didn't happen, but she was so steamed she had to blame someone.
Mary Merriweather felt she was born way too late and wished she could have been a part of the 'women's suffrage' movement back when the first national suffrage organizations were established in 1869. She just knew her ideas and exuberance would have made it happen much sooner.
All the time, Ms. Merriweather paced and thought to herself, Ms. Andrews added the new tinder to the firebox. Jane now had Mr. Chassen disciplined and soon to be terminated for not stopping the confrontation, that morning. Little did those two women know how Principle Chadwick would decide to handle the situation?
"Jane," called out Ms. Chadwick. "Please ask Trevor Fletcher to come to my office."
Now, Jane Andrews had a name she could add to the gossip hot-line and would do so as soon as she had the boy brought to the Principal's Office. Not long after, she had the names of all the boys and girls involved. She was beside herself with the information she just knew would be a hot topic of conversation throughout the community that evening.
Meanwhile, Trevor explained what he said to Emily, and why, and what the girls continued to do to all the boys, the rest of the morning. Gordon Thomason, Eric Turner and Charles Symons, independently, not only confirmed what Trevor said, but also mirrored Mr. Chassen's account of what he saw happen.
Eventually, it came time for Emily to tell her side of the story, to Ms. Chadwick. The girl told a totally different story of her being attacked and hit numerous times by Trevor while the other boys cheered him on. When asked if she knew who else viewed the confrontation, she said that only her friends were there.
Principal Chadwick interviewed three other girls, about the happenings, that morning and all three girls gave, surprisingly, different accounts of what they said they saw transpire. After talking to the last girl, the Principal sat in her office considering all of her options. But, before she could make any decision, the secretary told her a number of parents called to talk to her.
The Principle didn't seem surprised that the majority of the parents, who called, were the ones who always called when something happened at the school. She wondered where they got their information.
Over at The Cove, Mildred Johnson's lawyer contacted Mr. Thomas wanting to sit down with him to discuss his client's returning back to work. The lawyer insisted that since the judge only gave her probation, and her record would be erased soon afterward, she deserved her old job back. Mr. Thomas thanked him for his call and gave the man his personal lawyer's phone number and told them to work out a meeting date and time. Mr. Thomas knew that this was not over by a long shot.
As the Principal walked out of her office, she was met by John Henry Ostrowski, the School Board President. She knew something had to have happened, for the School Board President to visit the school, so she invited him into her office.
"What do I owe the pleasure of your visit, Mr. Ostrowski?" asked the surprised Principal, who stood by her desk.
"Well, Abigail, rumor has it … you're going to expel six plus boys and fire one teacher. I knew you could discipline the students but I didn't know you could 'fire' a teacher," responded Mr. Ostrowski.
At hearing that from the man, the Principal abruptly sat down. She responded to the allegations by saying, "I am not going to discipline six plus boys but will probably suspend at least one girl. As for how a teacher got into that mix, I have no idea."
"Yes, a Mr. Daniel Chassen's name came up in the rumor mill," Mr. Ostrowski supplied.
"I wish I knew how those rumors got started. The only teachers I've talked to were Ms. Merriweather, who brought the initial problem to me, and Mr. Chassen who actually saw what, initially, happened. The only students I talked with were some of the ones involved. I've been in my office since Lunch and haven't even had the time to make a phone call, let along go to the women's restroom," explained Abigail Chadwick.
"Then one of those people made a phone call, or two, and the rest they say 'is history'" volunteered Henry Ostrowski.
"You know … there is one other person who knows about some of this incident. … No … she wouldn't start that kind of rumor. She didn't know what we talked about … wait … were there other names given in this rumor?" asked a now suspicious Principal.
Henry Ostrowski pulled out a piece of paper with a number of names on it and passed it to Ms. Chadwick. He watched with interest as the woman reviewed all of the names.
"I wouldn't have believed it if I didn't see it," began Abigail. "These names … there are two more boys' names, on your list, and three more girls, on this list, that I did NOT talk to. The ONLY other person who knew the names is … is Ms. Andrews, my secretary. Ms. Merriweather and Mr. Chassen went back to their classrooms and didn't know which students I would talk to.
"Mr. Chassen did know which students were involved, as he saw what transpired, but he's been a good role model for the boys, here in the middle school. He's one of the few male teachers, so I wouldn't suspect him of starting any rumors.
"As for Mary Merriweather, she isn't a gossip, although she does still believe in 'woman's suffrage' and 'woman's rights', but fights like the dickens if any girl in the school is in trouble.
"Okay, do you have any suggestions on how we can dispel this rumor," asked the Principal.
Mr. Ostrowski thought for a few moments then offered, "I guess we need to find out if Ms. Andrews is the rumor monger. If she is, we will ask her to rescind the rumor and dispel any fears she started."
"And if she denies her involvement, or refuses to cooperate?" asked Ms. Chadwick.
"Well, she can deny all she wants," began Henry. "We do have a phone system that does record all the incoming and outgoing phone numbers along with the dates and times. Just like the phone company, of old, did to record your long distance phone calls, in order to charge you. If she refuses to cooperate, we may have to find another secretary. We may have to do that anyway if anyone of the parents, of those students, whose names were released, causes a stink."
"Let me see, I know a very reliable student who can answer the phones for us while we talk to Jane. Give me a few minutes to set this up," announced Abigail.
Fifteen minutes later, a young 8th grade lad came into the office. Principal Chadwick explained to the boy what to do. She then asked Jane Andrews to come into her office, along with Mr. Ostrowski.
It was then that Henry's cell phone rang. He answered only to learn that Mr. Thomas called to find out why he wasn't properly notified that Robert could face disciplinary action. He demanded to know why he heard it from someone, other than the school Principal. He wanted an explanation and he wanted it NOW! Henry told him he came to the school to ask those same questions, and would get back as soon as he could, but, hopefully, by the end of the school day.
Henry Ostrowski no sooner hung up, but before he could put the phone into quiet mode, the phone rang again. When he answered, he found the Director of Child Protective Services called to ask the same questions Mr. Thomas just had. As he talked to two of the most influential people in the community, Abigail Chadwick and Jane Andrews heard his part of the conversations. They both were taken aback that both of those people called the man directly and not the school. Their hearts began to race.
After quickly getting his phone into quiet mode, Henry Ostrowski faced both ladies and said, "Ms. Andrews, I am here because people directly called me asking about some rumors that have surfaced, out of this school. We will do a thorough investigation because student's names were released. We three know that student names are never released to the public. We need to find the source of this release. So, we will begin with you, if you don't mind?"
"Sure, I don't mind you asking me a few questions," replied Jane Andrews.
"Okay, good … now, I will preface this by saying the school's phones are set to record all incoming and outgoing phone calls, and their time and date. I am asking you directly. Did you call anyone … and tell them that there would be some students disciplined here today?" directly asked Mr. Ostrowski.
Jane Andrews sat there for a bit before she answered, "Well …I may have."
Henry Ostrowski carefully thought about his next question, then asked, "Did you happen to mention that a teacher may be fired?"
"I don't really remember what I said exactly," quickly responded Jane Andrews.
"The rumor that six boys will be expelled and one teacher will be dismissed is floating out in the community and is spreading like wildfire," began the School Board President. "The truth of the matter, Ms. Chadwick tells me, is that only one girl could wind up being disciplined. We need to douse this before it spreads too far and wide. Now, think this through, did you tell anyone about what Mary Merriweather brought to the Principal at Lunchtime? If you did, then we know you can help us douse this fire."
Jane Andrews began to cry. She knew her job hung on her response but she also knew she should have not released any student names. She finally said, "Yes … yes, I did. I didn't think the person I talked with would ever spread it all through the community. I'll do whatever is necessary to help sort this out."
Henry immediately asked her to call anyone and everyone who knew anything about the rumor and to ask them to call anyone they called, etc., etc... Jane got up and immediately proceeded to her desk and made not one but five phone calls. The School Board President and the Principal both heard what she told the people, on the phone and hoped, that those people would do what she asked.
Robert, Eric, Gordon, Trevor, Brad and Chuck only learned about the rampant rumor, that they were going to be expelled, when they returned home from school that afternoon. All the parents were relieved when they received a call, from Principal Chadwick, that the rumor was false and school district people were attempting to squash it, in its tracks. The boys were equally relieved the rumor was false as they saw their lives come to an end, as they knew it.
As soon as Robert came home from school, Mr. Ken asked to talk to him in his Study. Robert got anxious, over the pending talk, since he had no idea what it could be about. He soon learned about the rumor from Mr. Ken, who asked what he knew, what caused it.
Robert explained that, just as Mr. Fletcher predicted, the girls weren't happy over not being invited to The Cove. He further told what Trevor said to Emily, the girl, who called and got the rest of the girls all riled up. He told his 'dad' what he knew about the interviews the Principal did with Eric, Gordon and Chuck, but didn't know which girls were talked to.
When Mr. Ken heard Eric had been interviewed, he called Judy Turner. The two discussed what they each found out, from their boys, and were relieved that neither, of the lads, did anything wrong. But that didn't relieve how upset they both were over how the rumor got started and so out of hand. Ken promised he'd make a few phone calls and let Judy know what he did.
Before dinner that evening, Robert and Eric talked over the phone about what happened at school and, between them, tried to figure out the whole story. They each called their other friends who got called to the office to find out what they knew. In the end, neither of them knew any more or less than Chuck, Brad, or Gordon. They hung up saying they'd figure it out more at school tomorrow.
At dinner, Ken and Robert talked some more about what happened at school. Robert told his 'dad' what he found out, from the other boys, which actually didn't add anything. Mr. Ken told his 'son' he called in a few favors from some influential people and hoped there'd soon be a total accounting of today's events. They finished up dinner deciding if they were going to have their Tuesday meeting. The events of the day didn't deter Robert who said he was looking forward to their get together, tomorrow.
Arriving at school after the 'big rumor', the boys thought that it would be the main topic of the day. They were mistaken by a mile. They came to find out, from some of those same girls who ignored the boys yesterday, Emily didn't come to school that day. One of Emily's best friends told the gathered group, of boys, and girls, that Emily told her she told the Principal that Trevor attacked and hit her and, unfortunately, none of the other girls corroborated her story, to that extent. The girl went on to say the Principal asked for a meeting with Emily and her parents for at ten o'clock this morning.
Unannounced, the girls did something the boys would have never expected; the girls apologized to the boys for the way they acted the day before. But, mostly, they told Trevor how sorry they were that he got pulled to talk to the Principal, for doing, essentially, nothing. Another girl said Emily told her that Mr. Chassen saw the entire thing and went to bat for Trev.
Some of the girls hung their heads for what they were a part of. But, the boys, they didn't want them to pay for what Emily did to herself so they gave the girls 'friendship' hugs that told them they understood, and were okay with it. That put a big smile on the girls and made a potentially gloomy type day into a sunshine type day.
One other person, who had a big smile, too, happened to be Daniel Chassen, but this time the group noticed him and waved to him. When the First Bell rang, the preteens all said 'Hi' to him as they passed by him on their way to their homeroom. Trevor stopped and personally thanked him for what he'd done. He then shook the man's hand and gave him a big smile before catching up with his pals. As the day progressed on, the boys and girls went back to being friends.
That night, Robert couldn't wait until dinner was over and they sat down to talk. It was Tuesday night and he looked forward to the night ever since Mr. Ken suggested they do this. He wasn't sure why he was on pins and needles, it was just going to be a talk, but he sure was. The schoolboy thought that it could have to do with the fact that his parents never took him aside, and just talked to him, as Mr. Ken had done over these past few months. And, over the past few weeks, it seemed they talked a lot more and he was really beginning to feel like he had a home and someone who really loved him.
Dinner was over and Ken could sense lots of anticipation coming from the lad. They decided at their first ever meeting they would faithfully devote the time to talk about things that happened at least over the past week - good or bad. Mr. Ken also told the lad he could bring up something, from the past, he really wanted to discuss or understand better. Ken was hopeful these talk would be productive. He would become a 'believer' in the months to come.
"Come on 'dad', hurry up!" came from Robert.
"I'm coming, I'm coming, hold your horses," replied Mr. Ken. "Where do you think we should sit? Great Room, Living Room, Kitchen Nook, my Study, the Pool Room, so what do you think?"
"I don't care, let's just sit somewhere it is comfortable and we can't be disturbed," replied the boy.
They decided on the Living Room since it didn't get used all that much and Mr. Ken said he'd paid all that good money for it and it was about time someone sat on that furniture. The three of them went to the Living Room, yes Chief had to be with her 'boy', and they took seats near each other.
"Okay, I call this weekly meeting of us to order!" Ken announced, looking to see if he got any reaction from his son.
"'Da aad'!" was what he got!
They sat there talking about whatever came to mind, but Robert wanted to know more about what his 'dad' did last Saturday night, that made him so happy. Earlier, 'dad' Ken had told him about his liaison, with an agreeable woman, and that they had good sex, but Robert was having none of the lighter details. He wanted something more tangible. He wanted to understand the attraction his 'dad' had, with a woman, and how what they did was like what they told him in sex education class.
"Son, I'm not about to tell you what she and I did. You're twelve, almost thirteen, and you've had sex-education classes and know about the 'birds-and-the-bee's' so what is so interesting about how we had sex? Besides, last Tuesday you had me explain about sex and headaches and a woman's' time of the month. You do remember that don't you?"
"Yes, and you did a pretty good job of explaining why those men may have used me for sex but … I don't know. I guess, I just, … well, I've never had sex with a girl before, and I was … I was wondering what was so different from what I had to … what my dad, my real father, made me do and being with a girl. I get the part about, you know … shooting and all that but … what happened that made you so giddy and happy?" Robert asked very seriously.
"Well, let me see if I can explain it so you can, at least, piece it together what it was like and how it felt. How's that? And if that doesn't work, I'll try something else, short of getting your own lady to have sex with." Ken jokingly said, as he reached over and towssled the boy's hair.
"'Da aad'!, don't mess my hair!" smiled Robert, relishing in the attention he got from his new 'dad'.
Ken tried his best to again explain how the object of masturbation and the actual act of inserting the penis into the vagina were related. Robert kept asking questions of how it felt and did it cause the feelings to be different. Ken mentioned using some sort of oil or lotion to increase the moistness of being inside the woman but Robert said he never heard that nor even thought about trying that. Ken then tried to relate the boy's sexual experience with his best friend without being too inquisitive and embarrassing his son.
"'Son' … I don't want to be … well, I don't want to make you tell me what you and Eric do, or did, but … maybe. it would help me explain it better using what you know. If not, then, we can try something else. What do you say?"
"Sure, I don't care," replied Robert.
"But, what about Eric? Don't you think he might be upset, with you, if he finds out I know what you two do together?" stated Ken.
"Oh, no … I won't talk about him and I … I'll use the stuff I remember from what I … well from before. Is that okay, 'dad'?" voiced Robert.
Ken felt he was now on hallowed ground when it came to Robert's past and what he had been forced to do. That became the first item Mr. Ken asked the lad to add to his List when he thought of having their talks. He wanted the boy to take his time and didn't want the lad to feel pressured into talking until he was comfortable about doing so. The boy knew, though, he had to eventually sit and talk to Mr. Ken about it. 'Dad' Ken wondered if this was now the time.
The ground rules were set. Robert talked about some of the times he felt good about the sex he had when he was forced to do it. He told of how some men made a game of it, tickling him, licking his nipples or sticking their tongue in his ear, and the kissing, too. The boy even talked about using some oils to let them slide along each other. Then, there appeared that a light had lit up, Robert asked if when you were being sucked if that was anything like what his 'dad' felt when he was having sex. A mutual experience was now found.
Ken went on to use that last question, as a starting point, to try to convey a better sense of what it is like. He explained, through asking his own questions, of how he felt as to what was involved in the act of having sex, with a female. He described how the warm mouth became the substitute to the very warm and enticing vagina. He told the preteen the saliva mimicked the wetness from the juices a woman flowed from her being stimulated.
Ken also went into the feeling of the breasts, of the female, and how sensitive they got during sex. He pointed out the touching the entire partner's body added to the ritual and heightened their climax, which eventually occurred. The talk was beginning to unravel some unknowns for Robert but he still had a nagging question about why the guys wanted to have sex with him.
"'Dad', the sex you had sounds like it was pretty good. But, what do the juices the woman produces really do? I don't understand that. I kinda understand the use of something slippery, as my dad made them use something called KY, and then it didn't hurt too much. I guess the warm ladies, ahh … ahh,…" and here the boy got stuck as to what words he should, could use in front of his new 'dad'.
"'Son', don't worry about choosing the right words right now. If the only word you know is a bad word or a curse word I am not going to get mad, or even upset with you. So, if you need to say cunt, pussy or box or fuck, shit, damn or asshole or any other word that will help you continue your thought process you have my permission to use them.
"I know this is a strange approval from an adult, and you may have a hard time saying them at first, but trying to say the correct thing may make you lose the train of thought you want to convey. So, please, 'son', say it and don't fret. Of course, I don't want you using them outside of our discussions but, for now, just say what you mean!" Ken told the lad, in order to get him to speak without trying to be PC, Politically Correct.
"Now, if you remember from last week I told you that the woman produces a fluid that helps make the penis slide in and out easier for the man. I also told you that the seminal fluid the man produces has the same effect. It helps with the actual sexual act," prompted Mr. Ken.
"Ahh … yes, that's right you did," the youngster recalled. "But 'dad' … I guess, what I am wondering is … is the woman's pussy real warm like … ahh well, like my ass was when the guys … ahh,… geez, … ahh, … fucked me? I mean … they are both inside the body so they both are gonna be warm there so it must feel the same, right? And, when they used to suck my dick that was warm and I felt really good most of the time, too.
"But … what I don't see or still understand is … why then would these men want to have sex with a ten year or an eleven year old kid?" inquired Robert. "There are lots of women out there. Couldn't they get one of those? And, I bet some of those guys were also married, so why couldn't they just fuck their wives?" finished the pre-teen, as he let his tears flow like never before.
All Ken could do, at this point, was to hold the crying boy and hug him close to his heart until he got control over himself. This was not going right, he was thinking to himself. I hadn't meant to bring his past up but is seems every time we sit and talk about sex of any kind old memories come up and the boy relives them again. Ken figured he needed to talk to Doug Jennings to see if Robert had been talking about the things the guys did and did Robert understand why those men wanted to have sex with a young boy. As the lad continued to cry, Ken began to cry for him as well.
Sniff, sniff, "I'm sorry 'dad' for crying like that. I just …"
"Robert, I'm the one who should be apologizing to you, for making you relive those memories. I'm the adult and I'm supposed to know better and … well, I screwed up!" countered 'dad' Ken.
"Thanks, 'dad', but the doctor I saw, while I was in the hospital, after the police got involved, told me I'd probably cry like this many, many more times before I would finally be able to handle what happened to me. I saw him almost daily. I stopped going to see him when I left the second foster home."
"Oh, Robert, I wished I'd known that. I'd have made sure you could have continued to see him, right away, after coming into my life. You could have remained with him until you were ready, you know, to stop going to him."
"Thanks 'dad', he said we were kinda finished, anyways, and that mostly we would do follow ups, or something, when I thought I needed that. I was supposed to get Miss Judy to make the appointment."
Hugging the youth to him some more, Ken just rocked him before saying, "It seems I missed a lot when they brought you to me those many months ago. I'm glad we got Doctor Doug involved so soon after your arrival."
"'Dad', all the other doctor did was talk about the same things over and over. I bet he did what he had to get me to tell him and the police everything. Once, I did that he wanted me to forgive the people who did that to me. 'Dad', he never said anything new or different. I was sort of happy not to have to go to him anymore.
"I really like talking with Doctor Doug. He lets me tell him in my own words and he doesn't push me to tell him anything. He listens and doesn't say the same thing over and over. I can see why Collin liked him so much."
"Well, let's think about this and maybe talk about it some later. But, it seems, there is a question you need answered. Why did those men do that to you when they had other ways to relieve themselves?"
"Robert, the answer is complicated. And I might not be the one who can fully state the Why of it all, but I will try my best to give you something you can use to maybe move on with your life. Okay?"