Well That Was Unexpected
By David Spowart
Edited by J Matlock
By David Spowart
Edited by J Matlock
"Come in" I yelled as we were almost dressed.
"You guys ready yet?" asked Dale, looking at Todd dressed like a lesbian from New Jersey. "Wow dude, you hoping to convert some chick?" he mocked. "Why, what's the problem with plaid?" Todd asked. "The only thing missing is denim dungarees" Dale laughed.
He stood and looked at himself in the mirror. "Shit, you're right" he groaned. "Just grab a plain T and you will look fine...trust me" I informed him. "It's not as though you are intending to score, is it?" I added.
"Nope, been to that water fountain once and that will do, thank you very much" he laughed. He grabbed a plain white T and changed. I still admired Todd's amazing body; he was ripped. Cal then walked in and looked hot enough to eat.
"Hot" I whispered into his ear. "Okay girls, let's leave this joint" added Dale, as we had to pick the girls up before heading off to catch the bus. "Kyle and Aaron?" I asked. "Oh, they went at 7pm - we will meet them at Busties" Dale replied, as we headed to the girls dorm.
They were standing outside the building when we got there. We just managed to catch the bus, and we were off for the night's adventure. "Cal, don't freak out if some guys start talking to me" I said, sitting next to him. "Ditto, I only have desires for you...remember that...but no flirting" he added.
"Trust me, everyone on the strip will know who I am with" I responded, with a smile.
25 minutes later, we arrived at the east end of Cooper Street and headed for Busties. "Sounds busy" Lisa said, holding onto Dale's arm. "No going native tonight" he said, squeezing her arm. "You would pay to see that, and you know it" she replied, laughing along with Laura. Knowing Dale, he would pay to see just that.
"Twins Hmmmmmm" Todd joined in the chat.
"Two straight broke boys" I pointed at Todd and Dale. "Hey Brokeback, leave us out of your fantasies". We all bust a gut laughing as we arrived outside Busties, walked in and headed for the bar.
"Look at those two" said Dale, as Aaron and Kyle were busting a move on the dance floor and not looking stupid. "Fuck, he can dance" replied Todd, looking at his best friend. "Yeah, a definite John Travolta" added Dale. "Yeah, but who's Olivia?" Todd laughed. "Oh, we know who that is" I laughed out, as Kyle stopped and admired his boyfriend.
"Hey guys" yelled Kyle, walking back toward the bar. "Your dancing is awesome, dude" Todd said, as he shook his best friends hand before grabbing him into a hug. "Yeah, real footloose" added Kyle.
"Kevin Bacon, or the new dude?" I asked. "Oh, Kevin, most definitely. He was hot as shit in that film" Kyle responded, and the girls had to agree. Even though it was well before our time, I had to agree with them.
"Hello stranger" I heard a familiar voice, and turned to see an old hook-up approaching us. I could see that Dale recognised him as well. "Hey Jeff, how's it hanging" I said, as he hugged me. "Oh, J, you know the answer to that question" he replied, and my face went red.
"Are you going to introduce me to your friends?" he asked.
"Oh, yeah, sorry. Guys, this is Jeff, an old friend. Jeff, this is Todd and Dale, my two best friends. "Oh, twins" Jeff interrupted. "Yeah, this is Laura and Lisa. They are dating Dale and Todd" I replied.
"Damn, more straight meat" he moaned.
"Yeah, and this is my boyfriend, Calumn" I added.
"Hottie! Me likes" he leered at Cal.
"Hands off, he is spoken for" I informed him. Wrapping my arm around his, I let him know with certainty that Cal was mine. I couldn't have been more informative, short of pissing down Cal's leg, marking my territory.
We talked for a while, until Jeff spotted a couple of new potentials and said his good byes.
"So, an old hook-up?" asked Cal. I didn't speak; I just smiled and nodded. "Babe, we all have ex's" Cal replied. "He wasn't actually an ex, just a hook-up" I replied.
I leaned into Cal and kissed him softly and he returned the affection. He smiled and then began talking to the girls for a few minutes.
Cal walked onto the dance floor with both girls following. "So, that was the guy, I take it?" asked Todd. "Yeah, and yeah, I can see it now; he is a bit full on" I added. "Josh, it was all new to you and you had to start somewhere; just, did you have to start so low?" Todd added.
"Fuck you" I laughed out, with Dale pissing himself, also.
"Oh, we are being summoned" Todd said, as he looked onto the dance floor as the girls were beckoning them over. Like faithful puppy dogs, they obeyed.
"Come on, lover boy, you are not getting away with it" Todd grabbed my arm on one side and Dale the other, as we all ended up on the dance floor.
"Come here sexy" said Cal, wrapping his arms around my neck. The song was fast paced, but we were not. We slow danced three songs in a row. "You make me, you know that, right?" he said. I looked into his eyes and all I could see was love. "I'd die if" he interrupted me. "Babe, don't fret, I thought I was ready; I was wrong" he added.
"I never want to see that look in your eyes again, Cal; it almost killed me" I said, kissing his lips. "What happened to no public shows of affection" said Todd, sidling up next to us. "You are in our world now, earthling" replied Cal, with a sly grin plastered over his face.
"Point taken" Todd responded, dancing away with Laura, kissing her to show some form of solidarity. "Oh, get a room" I took my turn to have a pop back at my roommate. "We should do this more often" Cal added.
"Perhaps, when things calm down some at school" I replied. "Tough year coming up" I added. Then, I saw a look of concern on his face. "Babe?" I asked. "Nothing, it's..." he trailed off. "Your Mother, I take it?" I enquired, as we took our seats away from the dance floor.
"It's just, when you said it was going to be a tough year; and, well, let's face it Josh, she isn't helping, is she" he started.
"Sorry, I don't want to spoil our night" he admitted. "Don't be fucking stupid. What affects you affects me; so, no spoiling anything" I responded, holding his hands in mine. "You are my life" I added. His mother is still fucking him over, even now. I will have my say when we do meet...fucking bitch!
"Okay guys, lets bolt. We can see what else this place has to offer" I said, pulling Cal out of his funk. "'Loose Guys', about four bars down, is always fun. The drag acts are somewhat legendary" Cal informed us. I had been to that bar a couple of times, and, yeah, it was all that and then some.
We walked down and Lisa shot inside a bar that I knew all too well. "Where is she going?" asked Todd. "She needs the toilet" replied Dale. "She's in for a shock in that place. It's a guy only place, for obvious reasons. A real leather bar" I added.
We followed her in to retrieve her. She stood there horrified, as, on stage was a sex show in full swing. A guy was strapped to a table and was being serviced by a couple of horse hung black guys; one in his mouth and the other buried in his ass.
"Now, that's gotta hurt" giggled Laura, grabbing her sister. "I... I... I don't I" Lisa was lost for words. "Come on, Lisa, let's stop you being traumatised" added Dale, looking at the stage, as black guy number two ploughed his way back into the guy strapped down on the table. His ass had to be sore.
We got outside and looked at Lisa. She looked stunned. "He was so big" she held both hands up like she was measuring a fish. "Don't freak out on me babe" replied Dale. "I won't, but shit, did you see the look on that poor guys face? He looked ... well, he looked defeated" she added.
"Sweetie, they are paid to look and behave like that. They probably do porn together" I replied. "You mean he takes it more than once; and like that size?" she asked. "Sometimes bigger" Cal added.
"Have you?" she asked, and I was, as was Cal, stunned at her candour. "Lisa, I am not going to answer that" I replied, and Cal looked over and nodded at her. "You dick" I laughed. "I am not a whore; I only have sex with people I love and care for."
"Erhmm... Jeff?" asked Todd, and Cal looked on. "Shit, for fuck sake. I was young and horny; and, plus, I never had penetrative sex with the guy" I replied. "Dude, we are not judging" replied Todd.
"Yeah, he had sex with Candice, remember?" added Laura. "How can I forget? That bitch" responded Todd, wrapping his arm around the new girl in his life. "It was enormous" Lisa still went on. "Let it go, sis" Laura replied.
"I'm definitely getting some tonight" whispered Dale into my ear. "Yeah, but she will forever compare you to Jumbo guy, now" I laughed back.
"SHIT" he replied.
"What" asked Lisa? "Ermm, nothing, Babe" he replied.
We walked into `Loose Guys' and the place was packed. The drag act was on stage and the place was jumping. "Hey, cut it out" I heard Todd yell. "Some dude just grabbed my ass" he added. "Why not; it's a great ass" a stranger commented. "Yeah, but I am not gay" Todd replied. "Such a waste of a good ass" the stranger replied, turning back to watch the drag act.
We managed to find a half empty table and sat down. Lisa was still thinking about the size of the black guy's dick ploughing into the small white guy strapped down on the table. "I mean, the first guy being sucked wasn't small, either" she continued.
"Babe, let it go. Yeah, we all saw it. He, or should I say they, were hung; and the guy strapped down was loving it. Yeah, we get it" Dale replied, sounding somewhat pissed.
Dale stood up, and, with Todd, went to the bar to order the drinks for our group. Cal and Todd had already had a few; and, well, let's face facts. We do not let our hair down that often, and, with the time that Todd has had; and now with Cal with his mother, they deserve to have a little fun.
Dale returned to the table, drinks in hand, and Lisa could see from his expression that he was still a little pissed at the way she went on after the sex show we walked in on.
"Dale my love, they may have the goods; but, babe, you know how to operate the machinery" replied Lisa, and that brought Dale back to life. "Too right I do" he replied, pulling Lisa into a kiss. "Definitely getting some" he again whispered.
"Sweetie, you cannot whisper for shit" replied Lisa, giggling like a naughty school girl. "But you could be right" she added.
"Told Ya" responded Dale, smiling like the Cheshire cat.
We stopped and watched the act; no sex involved, thank God. Two rambling, traumatised women we could not handle. We hit three other bars; tame ones, only. There are some rough gay bars on the strip on Cooper Street that even I would not dare to enter. BDSM bars do nothing for me. Besides, it would bring back some memories of last year I would rather not have surface.
I looked at my watch and it was nearing 2am.
"Okay guys, let's call it a night. We can get a cab back to the campus. We missed the last bus" I said to our group, I being the only one considered sober. Todd was at the giggling like a school boy stage. "He said I had a nice ass" he giggled pointing at his ass.
"If you were a chick, I'd bang you" replied Dale. "Would you? Ohh, thanks, man" replied Todd, hugging Dale. "Now who is going native?" laughed Lisa.
"Love you dude" added a drunken Todd
"I think I'm going to puke" blurted Cal, and he did. He emptied the contents of his stomach into a bush before he hit the taxi rank. "Never again" he moaned out, as he continued to throw up. "Better give it five minutes before we get a cab" replied Lisa, looking at a struggling Cal.
We stood there in what I would consider arctic conditions. It wasn't snowing, but it had to have been several degrees below freezing.
"I love you, dude" Todd said, still with his arm wrapped around Dale for support, and totally shitfaced and feeling no pain. "I love you, too, man" Dale responded. "You would definitely bang me?" Todd repeated. "Dude, in a heartbeat. If my love was not here and I was single and you were a smoking hot babe...yeah, I'd bang that ass wide open" Dale blurted out. "Ah, thanks man" Todd replied drunkenly.
"You okay, Babe?" I asked Cal, who had turned a pale green colour. "No, not really" he replied, and threw up again.
We sat for about half an hour in the cold, giving Cal some time to get his sea legs back. We then got a cab and arrived some 20 minutes later. Somehow, Todd managed to climb the stairs to our room, and Dale walked the girls back to theirs.
I put Todd to bed and he was out like a light within seconds. Since Cal was still shit faced, I put him in my bed, bucket beside his head --- just in case. I turned the thermostat up to get the room comfortable.
I sat in the large chair beside my bed and watched the two drunks who are two of the most important people in my young adult life; that is, outside of my family and Dale. Cal will soon be my family, and that, for me, is most important.
I fell asleep dreaming of the black guy giving it to the small guy on the table; and images of Lisa, oiling him with baby oil. I was awakened by the sounds of Todd emptying his stomach at the side of his bed. I did not have the foresight to place a bucket beside his bed.
"Ohh God...Oh God never again" he moaned out, as I put a bucket in his hands.
"Yeah, until next time" I replied.
"Ohh, my head hurts. Stop playing those fucking drums" I heard Cal yell. "Babe, it's just the wind outside" I replied, walking back to my bed. "What did I drink?" he asked. "Babe, the simple answer is, what didn't you drink?" I replied.
"Sorry" he replied.
"Blurghhh" came from Todd's side of the room
"For what?" I asked, talking to Cal, but looking at my friend struggling
"I think I ruined our night" he replied. Turning back to look at the sad expression on Cal's face, I said, "No you didn't . Yeah, you overdid the alcohol; but look over there. You were not the only one" I replied, pointing at Todd with his head buried in a bucket. "Hey, Cal. Ohh shit, why is the room spinning?" responded Todd, before once again throwing up into the bucket.
"You still love me then?" asked Cal
"Yes, babe, always and forever. Now, lie back down and go to sleep. We are heading for Chicago later on today; so sleep, okay?" I replied, covering up my lover, knowing he is going to have the mother of all hangovers. By the sounds coming from across the room, he won't be the only person struggling, either.
"You not getting in with me?" he asked.
"Nah. No offence babe, but if you puke on me, I will most definitely puke on you; so I will sleep right here, thank you very much" I replied, and he was snoring before I had even finished that sentence.
"Night Josh. Love you man" moaned Todd, attempting to stop the room spinning and trying to sleep without falling off the bed.
"Yeah, night Todd" I replied, and soon I was drifting off with a smile on my face. I wouldn't swap these two for anything.
To be continued...
Hope you liked the light side of college life in this chapter. email@example.com