By Monday of the following week most of my lab results came back within normal ranges; the tests that were still abnormal were improving. The dialysis treatments were discontinued since my bloodstream was clear of cocaine. I was slated for discharge on that Wednesday provided everything continued to improve. Those special tubes used for dialysis were removed on Tuesday, and by Wednesday, I was going absolutely bugfuck. I wanted out of the hospital. I wanted to go 'home' to those who provided their strength and encouragement to me.
June came to my room before her first surgery case that morning and left two envelopes on the bedside table for me to open at my leisure. She explained that one of those envelopes carried the HIV test results and the other contained the hepatitis blood examination findings.
After providing reassurances that she would be down later following her first operation, to see me in a couple of hours, she took off to take care of someone sick and in need of her skills. I needed her sensitivity and quiet strength but didn't say anything because she was needed urgently in the OR.
As soon as she left, I picked up those envelopes, stared at them for a few minutes then threw them down on the table and went into the bathroom where I stripped, brushed my teeth, took a hot shower then, throwing a towel around my middle parts I went to the closet I thought contained the clothes I'd been wearing when they brought me to the hospital. They were not there. I checked everywhere… no clothes.
I sat down on the bed and stared at those two envelopes for several more minutes. My trance like state was broken by the arrival of a nurse carrying green things in her hand.
"Here's you something to wear home, Joey. Sorry, but they had to cut your clothes off in the ambulance while bringing you here. These scrubs are the smallest we have. If you need some safety pins to close them up, just let me know and I'll find some."
I walked to her and took the scrubs, "Thanks. I appreciate it… I thought I was going home like this . I mean it'd be okay… uhm, I just want to get out of here."
She chuckled, "No, we wouldn't do that to you. We're going to miss you. You were our model patient… you're a fine young man, don't let anyone tell you otherwise."
"Thank you ma'am; I appreciate you all saving my life… I mean… yeah, thanks for bringing me back…"
"That's what we do sir… that's why we're here."
I looked at her carefully… she called me a 'sir'. The look in her eyes was warm and genuine. I wasn't used to being respected. I then realized that I had not respected too many people during my young life… and I decided that I would try to start doing it. She must have seen me thinking very seriously because she took hold of my hand, squeezed it gently and then left my room.
Unabashedly, I dropped the towel and put on the scrubs. While they were a little big around the waist and a little long in the legs yet they fit okay and were comfortable. I then went into the bathroom and combed out my hair. While I was in there, I heard someone come into the hospital room. I looked through the open doorway and saw Dave.
"Hey, there you are. Are you ready to blow this Popsicle stand?" Dave said then pulled me into a deep, deep hug. I lingered for a couple of minutes then released him, smiled and replied with a sincere nod of my head indicating my readiness to leave.
"She went to surgery. She'll be done in a couple of hours… well she should be done in about an hour or so."
Dave led me to the bed and said, "We can wait for her then. Oh, what are these? They have your name on them."
"Those are some lab tests… uhm, the HIV and hepatitis ones." I said distantly. Suddenly, I felt scared. My feet were tingling and my vision went into double duty. Dave saw what I was experiencing; I guess that I had this frightened look and demeanor about me. He quickly took hold of my hand and sat me down next to him, pulled me into his side and began rubbing my neck and shoulders. I put my arms around him. I felt like a scared little boy. As I started to get angry for feeling that way, something took hold - I think it was his quiet strength that captured my feelings and then sat anger aside because I felt safe and secure.
I sighed out a long breath of relief feeling the tension pass through and out of my body, and into him? Does that really happen? Can you really pass feelings on to another person? And then have them suck them in, process them and then discard them when they are negative or counterproductive?
Somehow, those envelopes no longer looked as daunting as they had appeared to be just a few minutes before, so I picked up the first one, stared at it for a couple of minutes, opened it up then pulled out a small sheet of paper that had the bold letters "HIV" and my name written across its front. I showed it to Dave. He thought that I was handing it to him… I guess, subconsciously, I was. He looked at me carefully then drew me back into his side and put his arm around my shoulders and squeezed meaningfully.
"Okay. Here it goes." I said and then opened the piece of paper. Again, my name appeared and below that the words "Negative HIV Antibodies" were written. Tears immediately sprang from my eyes and flowed freely down my cheeks and landed in my lap.
After regaining my composure, Dave reached to the table, retrieved a Kleenex then dabbed my eyes dry.
"Okay, let's get this over with." I said thoughtfully then reached for the other envelope. I was startled by someone coming into the room. Quickly I turned around as did Dave to see June entering. Quickly, I excitedly ran over to her, pulled her into a deep hug, and said, "The HIV test was negative!" She held me tightly then kissed my forehead. I then took her hand in mine and led her to my bed where I sat her down next to her husband … but he quickly got up and moved to my other side.
Encouraged, I picked up the hepatitis envelope, opened it up quickly, it read, "Positive. Clinical correlation required."
My heart sank into the pits of my stomach. I got up and walked over to the window and looked out. A minute, no more than two minutes later, June stepped next to me then put her arms around me and said, "Honey, it's very possible that that is a false positive, or that you were simply exposed to hepatitis and carry the antibodies. Your liver tests are okay, I'm not worried about them, a little abnormal but they are improving day by day. The blood for the hepatitis screen was drawn while you were in the trauma bay when your cocaine levels were off the chart. We'll just repeat the tests in another 3 months and go from there. Let's not let these get in the way of your recovery, okay?"
Later that day, after arriving home from the hospital, Nathan came into my room and woke me from a nap. Without encouragement or invitation, he jumped into bed and pulled me close and said how glad he was that I was out of the hospital, and that I had decided to come 'home'.
Dinner was lighthearted that night. June prepared a 'killer' lasagna for dinner. It was then that I made the decision to coin 'lasagna' as my favorite all time meal, ever.
Nathan went to do homework, Derrick and I went to my room after excusing ourselves from the table and after receiving assurances that they would perform cleanup to the dining room and kitchen. On my way, I stopped in at the restroom where I deposited a massive load to the sewer system. I also thoroughly washed my dick as the condom catheter was irritating its head. I did not replace it right then but took one to my room to put on later. The urologist suggested that I go for periods of time without it since they had performed nerve conduction studies that revealed I had no neurological problems causing me to not have control of my bladder, and sex functions too. I mean, sure, I had tried, often, to jack off but I would get to a certain point and then could go no further, I'd been unable to fully experience an orgasm. He told me to keep trying but not to the point of frustration because frustration, anger, depression and hopelessness would only compound the problem.
After flushing and washing my hands, I returned to my room where Derrick was sitting at my computer surfing the net. He looked up and smiled then went back to what he was doing. I undressed completely then put on a pair of clean brief underwear and running shorts.
We talked for a while about nothing in particular. He basically got me caught up on what had been happening at the house during the time I was in the hospital. No biggie really; nothing to worry about. Mainly he was glad that I was home, and he was sure that it would be nice for me to sleep in my own bed… I readily agreed.
I guess that our lips were hungry for some intimacy because before either of us knew what was happening, our lips kissed tenderly though not particularly hungrily. I felt we were settling down into a brotherly relationship, so we talked a little longer and decided that it would be okay for us to have sex occasionally but we both knew that we'd never be boyfriends, per se, that our chemistry just wasn't there and we knew it so we weren't going to try and force anything. He did offer to help me get past the problems I had been having and continued to have with experiencing climax but we decided that I would relax and make a go of getting my nuts off alone in quiet solitude.
Just before leaving, he undressed me and then lubed up his fuck finger and vigorously stimulated my prostate gland to the point where a drop of milky fluid substance appeared on my fully erect dick, and threatened to cascade down. He then kissed me passionately and left my room after shutting the door securely.
I reached up and turned off the light and then took hold of my dick and began jacking it softly. The need to release was there, my pole was fully extended … but then I decided I wanted some extra stimulation so I got up and reached into my dresser and retrieved a medium sized dildo, lubed it up good, got back in bed, drew my legs up to my chest and then teased the dildo inside up to the hilt.
The urge to release was very powerful so I put my legs down flat on the bed and then drew them together so that the dildo would remain in place. I lubed my dick up some more and then began slowly jacking myself off feeling only the sensations of pleasure emanating from my dick and up into my entire body… I was almost in a meditative state; I was calm and hopeful that that day would be the day when I could release that which had been pent up for too long.
In that meditative state, I honed in on Wayne remembering his lips doing their magic, and my thoughts went to how he loved my dick inside of his insatiable cavern of joy, and how much I had loved having his ebony boy meat stuffed up to my appendix.
With my free hand, I reached down between my legs and began moving the dildo in and out, and from side to side all the while imagining it was Wayne's meat providing the fulfilling sensations inside of my bowels, and out through my cock … I was just about 'there', my butt muscles were hugging that dick like it was the real enchilada; my hip muscles were keeping in time with my hand; my penis was exuding a trail of essence adding an even slicker sensation; when I'd stroke down, my hip muscles would undulate upward. The sensation was overpowering, and my need for orgasm very nearly hit the crescendo, however, I got this sense of a presence close by.
Drawn from my deep meditative state, I reached up and turned on the bedside table lamp. Nathan blinked. I blinked from the bright light shattering the darkness.
Nathan smiled then before an invitation could be offered to him he laid down on the bed next to me, curled up and said, "Sorry bro. I just needed to be with you. I've missed you."
"Yeah, I've missed my pesky little bro but that same bro just interrupted… never mind Joey, I didn't mean that they way it sounded, sorry." I said meaningfully and looking into his sparkling eyes added, "You can sleep here tonight if you want to."
"Can I, really?"
"Yeah, I just said so, squirt." I said then turned over onto my side where we hugged warmly. As I turned over, the plastic banana slid out of my anal orifice and landed on the bed. Quickly, I broke our embrace, reached back behind my butt and retrieved that which had been providing many pleasures. I then reached for the towel and wiped my hands on it, then wiped the goo off of my butt.
Nathan's eyes opened widely at seeing the dildo. Curiously, he asked, "What's that?"
"Uhm, it's a dildo."
"A dildo? What's that?" Nathan asked curiously. He seriously had no clue, the look on his face told me.
"Uhm, well, girls usually use them. They put one into their pussy then move it around, in and out like a guys' dick is pounding them. Uhm, well, some of us gay guys use them too because we like to be fucked up our butts." I replied factually, warmly, knowingly.
"Doesn't that hurt?" Nathan asked while reaching over to touch it. I pulled it away from his reach and replied, "Brother I was using it; it has butt juice on it; maybe later."
"Okay… can I see you… uhm…?"
I thought and debated with myself very quickly, then after thinking that it would cause him no harm, I raised my hips up, checked my hole to make sure it was lubed up, and after finding it was lubed 'enough', I deftly inserted the head into my tunnel and then guided it up to the hilt. I groaned the entire time that the 8" piece of hard rubber passed over my prostate gland, and then began fucking with it.
"That's kind of neat, Joey. Does it really feel good?"
"Oh hella ya, bro."
"So, now what?" Nathan asked curiously while leaning down and watching me with rapt interest, fucking that dildo in and out. He reached down into his shorts and rubbed his hard cock which had been tenting out his BVD's.
"Uhm, I usually jack off, you know…"
"Kewl, I guess."
That said, he stood up then tore his underwear off, got back into bed, placed himself at my feet, lifted my legs up enough so that he could put my legs on either side of his hips then began rubbing his hard dick with keen desire and intents and purpose. Thinking "what the fuck anyway", I took hold of my still very hard cock and began jacking it in earnest. Quickly, Nathan tensed his body and immediately shot his wad spraying it all over my lower belly and legs. As he enjoyed his intense orgasm, I upped the pace jacking my own pole of pleasure… once again I got to the brink, and at the same time he pushed my hand aside, and began working the dildo in and out of my anal orifice… the experience was extremely hot, and before I knew it, the most intense orgasm took hold of my body. The lower half of my body raised up from the bed as my cock jettisoned a massive load of white molten hot straight up in the air landing wherever it landed… I was too far gone to pay any further attention to how much or where it went.
While the spasms were subsiding, the next thing I knew was Nathan lying on top of me, and despite a second or two of making feeble attempts to stop him, relented. When he was in position, he wrapped his arms around me and held on tight. Unable to stop myself, I reached my arms around him and hugged his body purposefully.
When he raised his head up I saw the most contented look on his face that I'd ever seen him have. As if orchestrated, our lips came together with meaning and purpose then when we broke away he lay his head back into my neck and then whispered, "I love you, Joey."
Feeling warm, cozy, contented, and loved, I whispered back, "I love you too, bro. But let's get up and go take a shower…"
"Yeah, we're gooey. Come on." Nathan said while getting off me.
I pulled the dildo out of my orifice, discarded the condom into the trash can and put the sex toy into its resting place deep in my bottom drawer. Meanwhile, Nathan had streaked to the bathroom and when I got there, he had the temperature in the shower just right. Without a care in the world, he began washing my body with a tenderness I didn't know he had in him, yet at the same time I realized he was a gentle and kind kid who loved his big brother big time.
"Uhm, what does it feel like when some guy fucks you?" Nathan asked hesitatingly, haltingly.
"I like it. There are no words to describe it, really."
"Doesn't it hurt?"
"Yeah, sometimes but then it usually always turns to killer good feelings. Why do you ask?"
"I don't know. I was just wondering. I mean I like girls and want to fuck with them… is it wrong for me to want to fuck with a guy?"
"No, not at all, I've known quite a few straight guys who liked it."
Nathan's face showed deep concentration… his wheels were definitely spinning wildly then he looked into my eyes as he was finishing up my shower by soaping that where God split me in half tenderly and searchingly. He began fingering the door to my inner sanctum, then realizing what he was doing quickly retreated then said apologetically, "Sorry."
"Don't be sorry. You weren't hurting me or anything. At your age, it's pretty normal to wonder about your sex stuff. Uhm, if you'd like to, you can put your finger back where it was because I liked it, but only if you like it… it's your choice, meanwhile I'll wash you, if you'd like me to?"
That said, he turned around and got his head wet. I squeeze out a dollop of shampoo then proceeded to wash him with the same care and respect that he'd shown me. When I reached his globes, I lingered and fingered the door to his inner sanctum in the same manner that he'd done for me. He pushed his hips out willingly and then said, "That feels good, don't stop, please."
I felt his anal muscles relax which, when I pressed more firmly allowed my finger to enter his sanctum up to the first joint. He did not tense up instead he took half a step back toward the finger that was entering his sanctum causing my finger to slip in to the hilt.
Slowly, I withdrew my finger but he quickly took hold of my wrist urging me to continue. I then began slowly fucking my finger in and out, searching for and finally finding that little bud of tissue I'd found to be exceptionally stimulating for my own body. I pressed on it carefully but decisively. He squealed in delight, groaned with expectation and began undulating his hips outwards as I entered inwards.
He then rapidly jerked away and yanked my finger out. Without waiting for anything, he jumped out of the shower then sat down on the toilet, grimaced with intensity and purpose, and then his facial appearance changed to one filled with relief. I chuckled; he gave me the finger in response then got busy wiping away any residual effects.
That said and done, he returned to the shower and then retrieved the bar of soap and returned the ministrations I had given him. Soon, I was swaying my hips in time to his ins and outs. My body became needy, and by the appearance of his cock, I said, "Go ahead, if you want to… if you're still curious."
"That's weird, Joey." I looked at Nathan intently and seriously. He looked down to the floor, "Sorry. I'm crazy." That said, he quickly removed is finger from my butt then pushed his head under the shower jets and began rinsing off. While he was doing that, I was thinking crazy thoughts. He, himself, told me to let go. But he's my brother, my flesh and blood… I argued with myself then my thoughts turned to him… he's curious, and admittedly, I was curious also; I was curious thinking all the while what his penis would feel like in me…
With that settled, when he stepped back and away from the shower jets, I handed him a washcloth to wipe the water from his eyes and then said, "Wash my back for me, okay?"
"I already washed it. Come on, let's get out of here before the water turns cold."
I said, "Just this once Nathan, just for you to see how it feels… but only if you want to."
Very quietly, very softly he said, "This isn't exactly what I meant… but okay."
I turned around offering him that which he wanted to try out.
After a moments' hesitation, he placed his hands on my hips then gently but decisively pulled me back into him. Once his 4.5 pole of steel touched my pucker, it opened widely and readily and accepted him in without a second thought. He took in a deep breath, and then unable to stop himself began pounding me without abandon. I reached down, took hold of my cock and began jacking however he flipped my hand away, saying "Don't."
That single solitary word said, he slammed into me one more time and then blasted my rectal walls with a load of whitewash to be proud of. When he ceased all motion, we stood there savoring his aftershocks until they too were gone completely.
Then, without a word said, he stepped in front of me then backed up into my pole of steel, took his hands and pulled my hips toward him until our connection was made.
"Nathan, I can't do this to you. It'll hurt you."
"Please, just this once. I just want to see what it feels like. Just go slow."
All reserve left me when he began squeezing my cock urgently. Lost in a sea of wanton desire, I moved my body closer and closer and put the head of my cock at his back door, and then pushed forward just enough for my dickhead to touch that where he wanted me to be.
He undulated his hips backwards, and then instinctively, I pushed forward, unable to stop myself. But then he tensed up severely as the head of my dick began to push past his tightly clenched sphincter.
Quickly, I stepped back, saying, "Sorry bro, I don't want to hurt you. Come on, let's dry off and go find something to eat. Remember to never let anyone hurt you just so that they can get their rocks off… that's not what sex is all about."
"How do you do it, Joey? I mean how do you get someone's dick inside of you?"
"I've learned how to relax… it just took time and several attempts."
"Well, why don't you stick your finger back inside… I felt really relaxed once I got into it. Just this once, please?"
"Uhm, I don't know, Nathan. Come on, the water is starting to cool off." I said then took hold of the shower door handle… but Nathan took hold of my hand then placed it on his globes and urged me into his crack.
Unwillingly, my cock became totally hard as steel.
I soaped up his back far from away from his anal orifice and worked my way down to his globes and then washed his legs with soapy hands. Working my way back up, I stopped with my hands on the overhang of his developing bubble butt and worked my finger to that which had previously denied personal penal entry.
"Relax. Just let yourself relax like when you pee, in fact, try and pee… gently push your butt like you are trying to take a dump..."
He did. My finger easily glided inside of his orifice. Gently, then more urgently, I finger fucked him gingerly and then, once again, found that bud of tissue that he had liked for me to pay attention to earlier. By then he was totally relaxed. Slowly, I withdrew my finger and then poised my turgid spear at his backdoor. The head of my dick then slowly and carefully pressed against it. That time, he allowed me entry, and once my head passed through his sphincter, he pressed down like he was taking a colossal dump which allowed me to enter him fully and completely.
Unable to stop myself, I went over the brink and filled his love tunnel with my offerings until they were totally and completely spent.
As we had gone down to the bathroom, we streaked back to my room where we changed the sheets then quickly fell into a blissful and restful sleep.
The following morning, I vaguely recall June waking me and saying that they were going shopping and would be back later that afternoon.
At 10:05 I woke up with a raging hardon and with a desperate need to take a piss. Nathan, meanwhile, was sprawled crossways on the bed with his legs over my torso and my dick firmly entrenched into that crevice we had played with the night before.
Quickly, I disentangled, got up, threw on a pair of underwear then made my way to the bathroom where I let loose with a torrent of yellow liquid causing the toilet water to foam up like crazy. I didn't think the stream would ever quit - the relief was palpable.
When I returned to my room, Nathan was lying in bed awake idly playing with his turgid spear jutting from a small thatch of dark curly pubes. The only thing that he was wearing was a contented smile.
Immediately, my thoughts returned to our interlude the previous night, I asked, "Are you okay this morning, you know?"
"Yeah, I'm fine, a little sore but no big deal." He replied then got up and with his cock leading the way, he headed into the bathroom where he let loose with a stream of pee to be proud of. Then the shower turned on… I got busy with making the bed then after getting dressed in a pair of jeans, a green t-shirt and black socks I went to the kitchen and noticed the time was 9:05am. Nobody was home however there was a note on the bar that said they had gone grocery shopping and that Nathan was still asleep. I grinned knowing better.
Cold cereal sounded good so I poured two bowls of tiger food, sugared them down awesomely, got the milk from the refrigerator then sat down. Nathan entered the kitchen area sans clothing, smiled and joined me. He said warmly, "Are you okay this morning?"
"Yeah, I'm good. Was it what you thought it would be?"
"Better than what I thought, Joey. But you were right, one time, I'm not curious anymore, I kind of liked it but I kind of didn't like it too, does that make sense?"
"Yeah, kewl, as long as your kewl, that's what matters."